- My back hair will be gross.
- I will sweat on her.
- She will look disgusted for the whole scene.
- I start crying (like I normally do during sex).
- She starts crying.
- I will make strange and off-putting sexual faces.
- I overdose on breath mints and deodorant.
- The cameraman refuses to shoot the scene.
- I wind up on (celebrity nude website) 'Mr. Skin' or 'Mrs. Skin,' if there is one.
- Her husband murders me.
- I have pimples on my tushy.
- Passing gas.
- My arms give out and I crush her.
- The ol' involuntary arousal.